Janelle's e-mails to her family

Monday, October 4, 2010

Conference Week

Thank you so much for your letters this week. I love you all so much. You all have no idea how important you all are to me, and how grateful I was to receive your letters this week. They mean the world to me. I am so glad to hear that all is going well and that you all enjoyed conference. I just love you all so much. I think of you often, and it makes me smile. I thought of you all so much during conference. It just makes me feel so great knowing that I have the family that I do. I know that I was sent to a purpose to you all, and I just really don´t know what I did up there to deserve it. I just can´t say thank you enough for all that you have done and sacrificed for me growing up and now, so that I can serve this mission. I know this is what I am supposed to be doing right now. I know it. I love you all so much. I can´t tell you all enough.

Well, this week´s letter will have to be a short one, without pictures. We have a Zone activity that we are going to have to meet up for so I don´t have time to write a lot. But I´ll write what I can with the time that I have.

To be honest this week was kind of a rough one. We lost quite a bit of ground with numbers...I´m not really sure why. Everything just kept kind of falling through. The hardest blow came yesterday when only one of our investigators ended up coming to conference. There were four opportunities for people to come and only one did. Few of the members and recent converts came either. It was so great to hear the words of the Prophet, but it was hard to hear them knowing that people that really needed it weren´t there. I cannot pin point why this week was so difficult, but I am learning to have faith in the great principle of agency. I am learning that even though I want to with all my heart, I can´t make anyone do what they deep down don´t want to do. I could love these people to death, but if they don´t love their Savior enough to keep His commandments, and receive His blessings, I can´t make them. I think the realization of that this week is what was the hardest. I think that´s why they say the mission is so hard. Before all we really had to worry about (or thought we had to worry about) was ourselves...now we worry about the salvation of souls. It is a big charge, but I am so grateful to be trusted to do this. I am really focusing on just loving the people more, having more faith in them, and not judging people. We were a little beat up this week, but we have toughened up and we´re going back for more. I have faith that we will have a great week this week. We are happy and ready to do what the Lord has planned.

I don´t mean for this letter to be a complainy letter in anyway...I just say it like it is. It was a hard week, but I am so ready for more. I am glad to have a fresh start this next week, and I am so grateful for the Conference to boost my faith. I know that I am just where I need to be doing what I need to be doing. Even though I can´t see that I am making a difference, I have faith that I am. I know that there are many very special lessons to be learned in the trials of life. That is what I wanted to share with you in this letter. Sometimes life isn´t a fairy tale. Sometimes it just downright stinks, but really that is when we learn. That is when we get to figure out who we really are, and what we need to improve. The Lord gives us weaknesses to make us stronger. To humble ourselves and to have a clear, untainted vision of who we are and what we want to become. I am so grateful for every challenge that we have had this week, and all the challenges that we will have. There is a purpose, and with them we can see clearer than without them.

I love you all so much. No saben cuanto. I pray for you all always. Thank you for all your love and support. I hope that this wasn´t too much of a downer letter. I didn´t mean it to be. I just want you all to know that I love this work more because it´s hard. Easy come easy go. I loved the quote in conference "You get what you pay for". It´s so true. I gotta give it all, cause this is a once in a lifetime chance for me to do that. I am happy, and I am so grateful to be trusted with this work. I love my Savior Jesus Christ and His atoning sacrifice for me. What would we do without that knowledge. Be grateful and act grateful.

Love you all tons.


Hermana Bertagnole

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